Bathroom Blues

Bathroom Blues

So apparently I’m a perv.  OBVIOUSLY, right?!  I mean, I’d have to be… letting my not-even-two-year-old son into the same stall with me so, God forbid, I could pee.

I have seen countless other moms take their little (emphasis on little) ones to the bathroom with them YEARS before I even had Gabe.  Seemed pretty natural to me.  What doesn’t seem natural would be saying to your barely babbling infant, “Ok, Tommy.. mommy needs to relieve herself… so you have to stay here, in the middle of Target.  But look!  Here’s a nice man coming to talk to you!  BRB!”  Yeah, no.  That would be a crying shame.  And she’d be the moron who’d sue the guy for kidnapping her kid… because she left him there.  In the basket.  In the middle of the store.

I think it’s safe to say that not many mothers would do that.  So when I got the hairy eyeball the other day for taking Gabe into the same stall as me… well.  Let’s just say I was a bit taken aback.  I mean, c’mon.  What could I have possibly been doing in a .5x.5 stall?  I can barely sit down in there, man!  Ah.  Morons.

I mean, my level of dignity dropped drastically when I went for that first OB check-up.  My dignity was shot when I gave birth.  So,  yes.  I take my toddler to the bathroom with me.  Does this make me one of those weird moms that breastfeeds until their kid is 35?  Hell no.  Does it mean I’ll drag him into my dressing room when he’s 12?  Of course not!  Will I be having the birds & the bees talk when he’s 6?  Never (in fact… I’m dreading EVER having to give “the talk”)!  But, the fact is, my son is just over 19 months old.  OF COURSE he potties with me.  And every mother on the face on the Earth usually, if not always, has a little 3ft shadow lurking behind her just waiting to holler for a glass of water while she’s mid-pee.  I’m not the only momma out there who pees with her kid.  Ok.  So maybe that sounded strange… but you know what I mean!

So maybe I’m weird.  Ok… that’s nothin’ new.  But I’m not the only momma in a tiny stall in Target with her kid(s).  And I’m certainly not doing anything inappropriate.  So I see your hairy eye ball and raise you a finger!

I shudder to think...

5 thoughts on “Bathroom Blues

  1. Is that really a problem for people (the one giving the dirty look)? You didn’t do anything wrong. What’s with some people? It seems like some parents just like to judge and look down on other parents no matter what they do.

    1. I guess I’m just going to have to do with him like I do with Coke at the movies… hide him in my tote bag when going to the restroom. It’s the only solution I have! I don’t know what her deal was. Guess she’d be the one leaving her kid out to dry so she could catch a toilet break.

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